Fiction TWH- Chapter Fifteen

Title: The Waking Hours

Author: Restive Nature

Disclaimer: All characters within this fiction are the property of Cameron/ Eglee. I just like to play with them.

Rating: PG-15

Pairing: M/A

Summary: Dreams don’t often come true for Manticore-bred soldiers. So when the chance comes along for Alec, he’s not quite sure how to take it.

Spoilers/ Time line: Sequel to Dream Within.

Feedback: Always welcome!

Distribution: Ask first, please.

Chapter Fifteen

Home Away From Home

The storm had passed.

It was apparent as the rain slackened off from the roof, moving from an incessant pounding against the metal covering to a gentler pinging, then the familiar soft splatter and finally a trickle down to nothing.

The same could sort of be said for Alec. As he had forcibly engaged in busy work, for that was truly what it was, the pounding in his mind, his heart and the rest of him had gentled as well. He still was of the self realized conviction that he had allowed himself to be ruled by emotions that he couldn't and didn't want to name when it came to Max. And by extension, the things in her life that intruded upon his. And that was pretty much everything. He had let his eyes become too full of her that it left sight for nothing else. And he knew that was dangerous for more reasons than one.

But when he finally packed up for the day, his excuse fresh on his lips of why he didn't keep to his promise and bring Max some lunch, or even retrieve any for himself, he was just a little dismayed to find that he didn't need it. As he left the office, his back pack of slightly damp clothes with him, he was surprised to see that her office door stood open. There were no sounds issuing forth from the room. As he cautiously passed by, he couldn't help letting his eyes slide in, widening when he realized that she really wasn't there. And from all he could gather in those few seconds, she hadn't been for a while.

He was trying to congratulate himself for being so good at his new intentions of not hanging off every word, action or thought revolving around her, in not even noticing that she had left her office. But somehow the idea fell flat. He should have been aware of her leaving. A good solider, which is what he was, should have known. But perhaps he had not truly noticed because his senses knew that she was still nearby or at least in the building.

Darting his glance down to the main floor, he scanned the area but could not see either dark mahogany hair, as hers was under the fluorescent lights they had rigged up, or even a feminine form amidst the still present population. His footsteps caused a clatter as he came down the steps, heavier than he meant them to be. But only one transhuman glanced up. The rest of them wee used to Alec coming and going.

“Hey Alec,” Luke called from his desk, his eyes just barely flickering to the side in acknowledgment that Alec was apparently leaving for the night.

“Hey,” Alec returned once he was on the bottom step.

“Can you do me a favor?” Luke wondered, his eyes returning to the computer monitor screen, even as his fingers had never left the keyboard.

“Depends on the favor,” Alec sighed, too tired from his new mental regimen already to play games. That got a slight smile out of the other man and this time he did move his hands. He turned to the protruding table that served as a secondary desk extension for all his extra bits and bobs that were necessary to his work. He plucked a file from a stack and held it up.

“Can you let Max know I've got her stuff here?” he asked politely and then turned back to his computer, taking for granted that if it involved Max, Alec would be only too pleased to perform. Well, Alec had to remind himself, it wasn't like he'd passed a memo with his new idealism, to the rest of command central.

“Any reason you can't tell her yourself?” Alec asked, his tone a little snide. That caused a stunned, owlish blinking in more than one being present.

“Well, seeing how she left a couple hours ago,” Luke remarked, pleasantly, crossing his hands over his stomach, “it's a little difficult for me to just run this upstairs. And since you live right next door to her, I didn't see a problem. Of course, if you'd rather, I suppose I can call one of the newbies to run her a message.” He turned to regard Dix. “What's that one kid's name? Jimmy something?” Alec's lips thinned at Luke's oh so veiled threat. He knew perfectly well what that suck up interloper's name was.

But Dix, ever the helpful transhuman that he was, piped up immediately. “Jiminy,” he nodded. “Good choice. Max likes him. Guess he makes her laugh.”

Alec's mouth was open and yapping before his brain could even fully digest what Dix was implying. “Don't bother. We were all agreed,” he reminded them swiftly, “newbies don't approach the senior staff unless it's an emergency.”

“Oh right,” Luke nodded quickly. “I just figured, he's almost through his transition and the guy's clean, as far as we've been able to find. I thought from what Max said, that she was gonna place him here, since he's all about comms. My mistake, I guess.”

“I'll take it,” Alec sighed. How difficult would it be? Knock on her door, hand her the file and say good night. He could accomplish that. He reached for the file, but Luke's hand shot out, covering the manila material before Alec could even touch it.

“Uh,” Luke hesitated, his eyes squinting a little and he shook his head, “directive 8?” he questioned gently and Alec grimaced. He should have remembered. It was one of Max's directives that everyone had agreed unanimously to. Sensitive material did not leave Command. Not in print or other viable for like that.

“Right, right,” Alec nodded quickly. “Okay, her stuff is in, anything else she needs to know?” he demanded tiredly, praying that there was nothing else.

“Nope,” Luke shook his head, his hand easing off the pile. “That was it. Have a good night.”

“You too,” Alec rejoined and turned away from the desk to continued his trudging steps towards the apartment building that he called home.

The entire way, he gave himself a pep talk, such as he had not needed since he was an unbearded youth, out in the big bad world on his first mission. He could do this, he told himself. All he had to do was stop at her door, knock, wait until she answered, tell her Luke's message and say good night. He didn't have anything to add, he had no other information to offer, so it should be a simple procedure.

But what if she wanted to talk?

He swallowed heavily, remembering how many times he had ended up being a sounding board for the various problems in her life. And not because she wanted him to be. But because he could not help sticking his nose in, trying to get her to open her eyes. To wise up about the reality of the ways of the world. And more importantly, as transgenics hiding in that world, how it would fall around them when things went south, as they inevitably did.

How could he convince her that he would prefer to have just a business, professional relationship when everything up until this point had been anything but? They still had to work with one another and even when that was all they did, there were still times and moments when it had gone beyond that. And there was also his resolution that she still needed someone close keeping an eye on her. And because he hadn't been able to come up with a qualified individual on his own, that meant he was still the forerunner in that position. To be honest, there weren't many others that he would trust with her well being. Even in just the strictest sense of the bodyguard job description.

None of the others around them were aware of Max's reactions to different things. They weren't used to predicting her behavior based on the stress indicators of her life. When a normal person would go one way, with certain persons or outside sources involved, Max invariably jumped the other way. And Alec knew that. And informing and training another person to that mind set, to anticipate her moods and stubborness was almost too monumental a job to perform. Alec was only good at it because he had been at it for so long.

He eventually reached the apartment complex and with trepidation building each step he took closer to her apartment, it was starting to turn into an actual physical illness. His stomach was clenching and churning as he contemplated what this moment actually would be. It took him several minutes to work up the nerve to knock at her door. And he was surprised because he had thought that she would have heard him coming and met him at the door as she had several times before.

But perhaps her mind was so full of good old Logie boy that she hadn't been paying attention. He strove to get his breathing under control, just noting in time, the heaving pants of breath he was exuding as his ire over Logan's interference again. Albeit from Max dragging him back into this mess.

But when his hand finally did come down on the solid wooden portal that was keeping them apart, it sounded empty. And seemed ineffectual. Like any force he was trying to exude was severely lacking. Alec waited just a moment and then repeated the procedure, a little more loudly this time around. But there was no answer. Nor was there any corresponding movement from within the apartment itself that he could discern.

Frowning to himself, Alec wondered if the emotional wear she had intentionally put herself through had been enough to make her knock off early. Was she hiding out in her room, licking her wounds yet again? Alec turned slightly, pressing his ear to the door. But he could hear nothing within. Cautiously, telling himself that he was just executing the duty that Luke had charged him within, he tested the door knob.

It turned easily and quietly under his hand and then he was once more in her apartment. But she wasn't. He could tell at a glance, just from knowing her so well. All inner doors in the apartment stood open. Meaning she wasn't taking a relaxing bath. Her bedroom door standing open, which meant she wasn't laying down for one of her unceremonious and very rare, until recently, rest periods. He couldn't say sleep, since she had informed him on several occasions that she didn't always sleep.

And she certainly wasn't in the apartment anywhere else. She had been there. He could tell by the slightly damp shoes at the front door that she'd been home to change them, but at what time, he couldn't say. Cursing slightly under his breath, Alec whirled around and as he approached the front door once more, noted that her favorite coat and her gloves were gone.

'She couldn't have!' he fumed to himself as he stormed out the door. His mind had made several intuitive leaps and he didn't like one bit where they were heading.

Of course, just like the usual song and dance, that Max and Logan performed, one would call the other, the whole forbidden fruit issue would rear it's ugly head and they'd be after one another like the glow on a firefly's ass.

'If she's snuck out of here...I'll...-!' Alec couldn't rightly decide what his reaction would be as the knot of fear and trepidation and just plain hurt curled in his abdomen. He stomped through the old building, on his way back out, not paying attention to anything else at the moment.

He needed to decide which course of action to take to handle this. Not only was it breaking a major rule that they had ALL decided on, Max bringing it up first, but this was taking a personal risk that she had agreed she would not do again. Not after her accident the last time. And what the hell had been so important that she had to go haring off-!

He had reached street level by that point, his anger fueling his speed and as he came out of the main door, he had been taken aback by the scene before him.

The rain soaked street took him straight back to the day of Max's accident. And just like it was for him, so it would be for her. Too close, too much a reminder of the badness that had followed.

Inhaling the fresh scent of the rain, on top of the detritus that rain always seemed to bring to an occupied area filled with substandard housing and sewer capabilities, Alec let the anger wash away. He was making these intuitive leaps based on the wrong assumptions. As he had sworn to himself that he was not going to run around making decisions based on his emotions, he realized that he was doing exactly that.

He had taken two plus two and ended up with twenty-two. And there wasn't even two and two to begin with. There had been a billion reasons from before. Back when things had been clear to him. The days before the siege, before the trouble had really started up. When all he had to worry about was making money, keeping his shelter and food supply and watching over himself and her. Keep them under the radar. But now he had been basing those assumptions off of what would have happened back then. But that was precisely because he didn't have a clue of what she would do now. This new Max was still pretty much an enigma to him.

Still breathing deeply, Alec forced himself to reassess before he flew off the handle.

Looking at just the plain facts, Alec curled his lips up. He knew that Max had a phone call with Logan. He knew that she had not approached him during or after the telephone call to share what was going on. He could draw conjecture from that, but would not at this moment, since that was what had made him fly off the handle in the first place. He knew that Max was not in her apartment. He had no proof that her conversation with Logan was anything but business. Or that it was anything but personal. He had no proof that she was hiding away licking her wounds. He had no proof that she had left the perimeter that they had created around Terminal City.

He also knew that he was expected to deliver Luke's message. So he had reasonable excuse to go looking for her and put his early assumptions to rest. And the first thing to do was to find out for sure whether she was in Terminal City or not.

Feeling that his assessment on the weather conditions holding her back from riding over to Logan's or anywhere else for that matter, was the correct one, prompted him to his next conclusion. Alec figured she'd be on foot. And that would normally cut, just a little, the time that she'd be ahead of him. But also, he had no time frame for when she left the office, when she had returned to her apartment, how much time she had spent there and where she had gone from there.

He debated for only a moment whether to follow one of two paths. He could check with the perimeter security guards to check in with them if Max had left. Or he could search out the other likely places that she would go if she were troubled. His first instinct to that idea was to say Joshua. And while it was true that she had been enlarging her circle of friends lately, it also occurred to Alec that she would not offend Joshua by ignoring him in any manner. Nor was she as likely to visit someone else when and if Logan or anything to do with Eyes Only was on her mind.

It would simply take too long for her to explain the bits and pieces that made up their relationship, even though the entirety of their population with some glaring exceptions were aware of that disaster. Alec knew he couldn't divide himself up to go every which way at once, though wouldn't it be kind of cool if he could. So he had to choose one and hope it was the correct path.

And that was how he found himself heading to Joshua's apartment building. He breathed a sigh of relief when he was greeted by a member of the X5-series, asking if he was looking for Max.

“Yeah, you seen her?” he gave a brief smile, though he wasn't quite in the mood. He would always, in some way, around some people, even if they were his people, subscribe to the 'show the world you're always alright' mentality. He was one of their leaders after all.

“Saw her earlier when I was heading out,” the kid nodded his head full of inky colored hair and there was an absentminded thought in the back of Alec's brain that perhaps Rory, the barber might have some business again soon. He'd have to talk to the guy about it. “I think she was heading up to see Joshua.”

“Should have known,” Alec chuckled with relief and a small nod. “All right, thanks.” The kid nodded and ducked into the building, holding the door for Alec. He trailed after the young man, who turned off at the second floor. Alec headed straight to the top. That could have been, he decided as he took the stairs two at a time, the other draw to bring Max here. She liked high places, he knew that well enough. And the view that Joshua had was pretty incredible.

Not even winded when he reached his friend's door, he still took a moment to inhale deeply and calm his senses yet again. He rapped sharply once on the door and found that it was unlatched and ajar.

“Come in!” Joshua called from the recesses of the apartment. Alec poked his head in, listening quietly, but heard no other sounds.

“Hey Josh,” he called back, once he was inside. “It's me.”

“Hey me,” Joshua chuckled back and despite things, Alec grinned. He moved into the living room that had changed little from the last time he had been there. Joshua was standing at an easel though, not aligned straight in the room, but at an angle. And Alec could see on the paper attached to said easel, as he moved up behind the large man, glimpses of what looked like a skyline. It looked like Joshua was trying to paint the view from his window, but at the same time, take advantage of the last of the light pouring in now from the break in the weather that was parting the clouds.

“Pretty,” Alec commented once he'd given the half formed painting a slightly more thorough look, as he clapped Joshua on the back.

“Never really try scenery before,” Joshua nodded. “Harder than it looks. Book says fill in the shadows. Give definition.”

“Good advice, I guess,” Alec shrugged and took a surreptitious look around.

“Brain does it all the time,” Joshua nodded as he brought his pastels board closer to him again and began combining a darker blue with a lighter gray.

“Huh?” Alec grunted as soon as Joshua's words penetrated.

“Brain,” Joshua repeated softly. “Eyes don't always see, so brain fills in what it's seen before. Like walking home. Do it so much, don't really look, but when the brain remembers, it sees everything that should be there. Fills it in, even if not looking.”

“Oh okay,” Alec nodded. He understood then what Joshua was referring to. It was a simple technique the mind had when one was preoccupied. It was why the assassin's precept of looking like they belonged in a situation that they actually didn't, worked so well. If they didn't look out of the ordinary, people didn't notice them. No one actually looked millimeter to millimeter of everything that they encountered in every environment they were in. There was even a name for it. Constructive perception.

People expected to see what they always saw.

“What Alec need?” Joshua prompted gently and Alec, startled out of his moment of reflection turned back from staring absently at the painting.

“Oh yeah, I was wondering if Max dropped by?” he offered simply. “Got a message for her from Luke.”

“Max here earlier,” Joshua nodded as he continued to mix colors. He dabbed a little on a blank paper at his side, contemplated it with a tilt of his head then went back to adding some more of the light gray. He paused for just the briefest of moments. “Alec not tell Max about painting. Thank you.”

“Not a problem big guy,” Alec grinned. He was still pretty happy that he'd been able to do that. “Did she talk to you about that?”

“Told Joshua idea of painting Angie,” Joshua nodded and then grinned. “Dress sounds pretty.”

“And what'd you think?” Alec wondered softly, assessing the big guy's mood. He was smiling, so one could assume it went well.

“Told Max needed time to think about it,” Joshua grunted. And then barked out a short laugh. “Angie pretty hard to sit still for portrait.”

“Probably,” Alec nodded and then laughed. “Yeah, she is pretty wriggly, isn't she?” He pursed his lips for another moment. “Maybe you could paint her when she's sleeping, when you watch her.”

The beaming smile on his larger friend's face told Alec that Joshua had probably had the same thought. Josh nodded. “Still moves, not as much though. Need her awake for her face though. Told Max needed to practice again.”

“So you're thinking you'll do it?” Alec hedged, wanting clear clarification. Joshua regarded Alec with huge unblinking eyes.

“Yes,” he finally answered slowly. “Thinking. Tell Max when I decide.”

“Okay,” Alec sighed, though he wasn't disappointed by any means. “Well, good luck with the practice then. So now, about Max...?”

“Visited,” Joshua dismissed with a shrug. “Talk about Angie and Gem. So she go visit.”

“She went to see Gem and Angie?” Alec demanded, though not harshly. He had just been thinking earlier about her new circle of friends and Gem was one that he would have counted among them. Joshua nodded. “Okay, well, I'm about done for the night. I'll just head over there and catch her real quick.” He stepped back and assessed the painting once more. “Night Josh,” he offered before turning away and making his way out of the apartment. There was a quiet murmur and once he was at the door, glanced back over his shoulder and saw that Joshua was immersed once more.

It was good for Joshua that he had something occupying his free time once more. It was too bad Max didn't have a hobby like that she could pick up to fill up the free time she had on her hands with her shark DNA.

Maybe that, he mused, would be the key to keeping her out of so much of the trouble she found herself in that wasn't related to Eyes Only missions, or rescuing the transgenics. But then, too, when was there time, or had been time in her life in recent memory for anything but those things?

Realizing that he was getting dangerously sympathetic to her once more, Alec instead filled his mind with the quickest route to Gem's. It was an inane thing to think about because Gem's place was ridiculously close to Joshua's.

But when he arrived there, it was to the bad news that Max had come and gone. She'd actually, according to Gem, who was whispering because Angie was down for a nap, had quite a lengthy visit. Over an hour that they had chatted and Max had played with the baby while Gem got some things around her apartment taken care of.

Alec had asked how her mood seemed. Gem had just shrugged and said about usual. She had seemed a little preoccupied when she had arrived, but when she mentioned that she had called Cale, then explained that it wasn't commonly known info, Gem hadn't pressed and Max hadn't volunteered anything else. Instead, they had talked of the clothing and supplies that Gem had received for Angie. She was growing again, what else was to be expected and Gem had been relived that she was now more prepared for it with the supplies. Max had even gotten to put Angie into a very adorable pink jump suit that had bunnies all over the bottom.

She was still wearing it if Alec wanted to peek in and see.

Alec stared at Gem's highly amused face and slowly shook his head, one eyebrow quirked up so high it was nearly reaching his hairline. His mouth opened to retort, but then snapped it shut, realizing that anything he said would either offend the young mother or be wildly inappropriate. Probably both.

“Actually,” he had finally sighed, “I'm off the clock here. I just need to deliver this message to Max and then I'm gonna go crash for twelve hours.”

“You are looking a little stressed,” Gem had nodded in agreement. “When she left, she said she was gonna go check in on some kids.”

It took Alec only a moment to realize exactly what kids that Max would be referring to. “JK's unit?” he asked and Gem nodded.

“That would be them,” she agreed. “I think she wanted to make sure the new girl was settling in all right.”

“Okay,” Alec nodded. “I know where they're lodged. Took Remy over there myself.” He smiled tightly at Gem. “Thanks.”

“Not a problem,” she said in way of farewell as she shut her door behind him.

Alec was starting to get slightly hot under the collar as he made it back to street level. He was thinking that maybe it would have been more prudent just to write a note and slip it under her door.

And the more he walked and thought, the more he arrived at the decision that if she were not present at the lodging for the younger X-6's under the watchful eye of some of the older transhumans, then he was going to return to his apartment and do exactly that. Of course, that would be after he checked in with the perimeter gard rotation to make sure she hadn't taken off completely.

Yuri, a short, incredibly pale, like no sun in her entire life, transhuman, nearly as old as Joshua, was on evening duty. There was a rotation of live in mediators present within the X-6's lodgings. While they were just as much trained soldiers, they were also younger and didn't have as much real world experience as the other older series and operatives. It had, after seeing some of the mischief some of the kids had gotten to in the first few weeks, been agreed that someone needed to oversee the group and be available to them for the unique problems they were experiencing.

That by no means meant that they had no contact with any others. Everyone knew that the X-6 and 7's created friendships within their own units, outside their units and with various personnel around Terminal City. That was not discouraged at all. They also had assignments around the city to see to, to help fill up time on their hands.

Alec greeted Yuri, who was lounging in the motel that they had chosen for the lodgings. It made sense, since the relatively small building was ideally suited for this type of dormitory style housing. All of the lodgers had to either go by the night reception desk when coming or going or go through a window. And since all of the windows were too damn small for most of the 6's to go through, the night shift was able to keep fair track of them. Not that they were confined to quarters, it was just usual for the kids to stop and talk a moment with whomever was on duty. They understood very well the need to be aware of their people's positions in the city in case trouble went down. Not many balked at this. A lot less than Alec would have thought, until he thought about the more stringent restrictions that Manticore had kept these kids under. And all of them, really.

“Hey Yuri,” he grinned as he allowed himself to prop his ass down on the edge of one of the arm chairs in the lobby. “Anything exciting tonight?”

“Not particularly,” Yuri shook her blond white hair, not taking her eyes from the book she held after she'd given Alec a cursory glance when he'd entered. “And she's not here.”

“Who's not here?” Alec near parroted automatically. He saw Yuri's lips curve into a grin, though she kept her face down. Only for a moment though, because when she finally turned the page and then used her finger to mark her page in the book, she glanced up, completely at ease, her face nuetral.

“Max,” she stated simply. “I assume you were here looking for her. But she left about half an hour ago.”

Alec rolled his eyes and sighed deeply. Of course. “Well, you assumed right. I've been chasing her all over friggin' TC to deliver a stupid message from Luke. 'Bout ready to give up and head home.”

“Well,” Yuri grinned again and allowed Ale to see it. “Since that's where she said she was heading, I thinking that would be the best course of action.”

Weary of the day's events, both real and imagined, Alec simply stood, turned to the door and left the motel lodgings. The sky had continued to clear off and in his travels it had gotten progressively darker until they were hovering on the verge of night. Internal lights, such as they had, were beginning to come on, though only were necessary to conserve their energy resources. Sure, they were diverging it off of other supply lines, but it still made sense.

It was as he was on the quickest route home that he knew, that Alec was startled out of his half numbed state of mind that he had achieved through forced decision to be that way, by a very familiar, very terrified shriek that was mixed with pain.

Max!

The thought, combined with a sudden surge of adrenaline that his body responded with, had him running before conscious thought really caught up. And even as he responded in the manner he had trained himself to, when it came to her, he had to admit, that all those plans and ideas and plots to dig her out of his heart were completely in vain.

There was no way that he could let anything happen to her. Whether he liked it or not, in this moment, in this time, he was irrevocably wound up in her. And it wasn't likely to change any time soon.


Chapter Sixteen