Series Title: Anything To Zipper
Chapter Title: Brick
Author: Restive Nature
Disclaimer: I do not own Dark Angel. This show belongs to Fox and Cameron/ Eglee. No infringement is intended and this fiction is for reading pleasure only.
Rating: PG-13
Genre: Dark Angel
Type: friendship
Pairing: Max/ Alec
Summary: Another brick in the wall.
Spoilers/ Time line: among "Love Among The Runes".
Feedback: Always welcome.
Distribution: Ask first, please.
"Where the hell have you been?" Alec exploded the moment he had finally found Max. He was outraged, incensed and a whole lot of other words that his worried mind had been busy trying to extrapolate from his suddenly limited vocabulary when he had discovered that Max had disappeared from Terminal City with no word to anyone. One of the many ways that he'd been trying to keep from worrying about her. He had dismissed it as normal. After all, he, they, had just lost Biggs. Not to White, or the police or God forbid, a resurrected Manticore, but to a cause hungry mob. And until they knew...
"Alec?" Max's voice sounded slightly puzzled and most definitely wary. And the rational part of his brain was telling him that she probably had good reason to, while the larger and definitely more irrational part was telling him to shake some sense into her. "What-?"
"No!" he thundered. "What the hell where you thinking, to just take off? No one knew where you were! And we have no clue how they discovered Biggs!" They both heard his voice crack slightly on his friends name, but Alec pushed aside the numbing grief that had bogged him down ever since he'd first caught sight of his friend on the news report. "And knowing you, you just took off, convinced that not a damn thing would happen to you, cause you're the invincible Max. You couldn't even have waited for me?" Never mind that he and Joshua had taken off to go deal with those scumbags that had thought trannie rousting parties the nouveau poor man's shindig. At least he'd had someone at his back.
"Alec I-!"
But he wouldn't let her continue. Even as the words bubbled forth out of him, Alec realized that his grip on her upper arms was tightening, and he heard her wince. But somehow that little gasp of pain, the trembling in his hands, the little shake he did give her now and then as he purged some of his fears upon her, assured him that she was okay. She was here, not out there, in any number of dissident agents hands, possibly, bloodied and...
"... and there is no way in hell that anyone, anyone else is going to get caught like that," Alec ranted, his eyes blazing with, unbeknownst to him, a pure, almost hypnotic fanaticism. "I know you think just because you've lived out in this damn world longer than any of us, you've got everything handled. But you don't Max." Another tiny shake. Another wince. "You were already shot a few times for God's sake. You've been up against White. And the cops? What if they decide to say screw real law and order and join the mobs under the guise of doing their damn jobs?"
"Alec I had to-" Max began again, squirming slightly to get out of his grip, but Alec was determined, for reasons he would wonder about later.
"No," he ground out from between gritted teeth. "No Max. No more excuses or flimsy lies. From now on, everyone buddies up. You and every other X5 that can walk those damn streets are going to have someone by their side. It's fucking common sense right now. And since I know you, I'll be the one at your back. Hell, I practically am twenty-four seven anyways. Got it?"
"Okay," Max grunted, her forehead furrowed deeply, as if she were still trying to puzzle him out. Alec wished her good luck with that, he barely knew for sure where this was coming from. "That's fine Alec. I was going to sug-!"
"No," Alec growled, worried about her giving in so easily, probably trying to placate him. "No okay's. I want your word. Promise me you won't go haring off. That means no popping over to Logan's on the spur of the moment," he probably shouldn't have touched that one, the way she stilled immediately, but he had to. He had to. "Runs together at Jam Pony, you hit up Crash, I hit up Crash."
"Really?" Max drawled, seemingly unperturbed, but Alec could feel the muscles in her arm bunching as her hands curled into fists. "And will I get two seconds to myself to take a leak?"
"Don't Max," Alec grunted. "Not in the mood. Just... promise me." Something in his voice must have rapidly altered the defensive mood she was entering, because her eyes softened just slightly and she nodded minutely. "Say it Max."
"I promise Alec," she whispered. "From now on, outside, we're joined at the hip." He nodded once, chewing on his lower lip and slowly released her. She flexed her arms again and it slowly came to Alec just how hard he'd been gripping her. He ducked his head sheepishly and lifted one hand to run over the back of his neck.
"Okay, I uh..." he began and his eyes darted around, finally taking in the rest of the people that were dotted about the large main room of the warehouse that the transhumans used to gather in at Terminal City. Most were ignoring them, although a few speculative shots were sent their way now and then. Alec couldn't believed that he'd been so worried about Max and where she had been that he'd had this out with her in public. He needed some time to cool off and she probably did too. "I'll be back," he half-promised, half-warned. "Gotta go see...uh." But to his relief, instead of making him come up with some sort of an excuse, Max just nodded curtly.
"I'll call or come find you when I'm ready to go," she informed him without looking at him, turning away already.
"Good," was the only word that left his lips as Alec began to skedaddle his ass out of there.
*****
"Hey Josh! You here?" Alec called as he stepped into the room that belonged to the dog man that he'd been shown earlier. Joshua had been happy to find another place to call home and when Alec had obligingly picked up some of the books from 'Father's' house, Joshua had given him the tiny tour before they'd put the books away together in the makeshift bookcase that Joshua had thought up.
"In here Alec," Joshua called back and Alec figured rightly, that Josh was in the bathroom that was shared with the occupant of the room just beyond the connecting door. The bigger man came out quickly and waited expectantly for Alec to explain what he wanted. But Alec was in one of those strange moods that were hard to explain. Restless and more than a little unsure of himself, given what had just transpired only minutes ago between Max and himself, Alec wandered around the fairly sparse room, touching objects, seeing nothing really, completely distracted. Until his big toe made contact with an unlikely protrusion from the table.
"Oh fuck!" Alec grunted as his shoulders hunched forward. He hissed as the toe throbbed for a moment and when his vision cleared of those annoying little black spots, Alec huffed a breath of very annoyed air and bent over to find out just what the hell he'd kicked. "Bricks?" he asked with amazement and then straightened up, a cocky half-grin adorning his face. "Why on earth do you have bricks in a bag under your table Josh?"
"Uh," Joshua glanced around and then shrugged one shoulder. "Project for Max. Needed books to finish. Alec brought books, now Joshua can work."
"Work on what?" Alec demanded, for he could see no earthly reason why Joshua would shift his attention where it had been, from painting, to working with already formed, well-proved as very solid, hunks of red clay. "If you wanted to sculpt something, I coulda hooked you up." Well, probably. He was sure he could have found someone into art supplies. At the very least, he could have contacted that art gallery lady for a supplier. She would know.
"Thanks Alec," Josh grinned, albeit a little sadly. "But Max already got bricks. Don't need more. Yet." There was something weary and definitive about that last word and it really piqued Alec's interest. But despite his inquiries, Joshua would say no more on the subject. The bigger man simply returned to his spot on the floor near the bookcase and picked up where he'd been before, leafing through a fairly slim volume that was covered in flowers and words in a flowing script.
Alec, wondering what to do with himself, since there was once again a definite lack of television in Joshua's living space, wandered around the room aimlessly. He did consider for a few minutes, maybe smuggling one in, but dismissed that immediately, knowing that Joshua would just haul it over to command to be put to use there. But maybe, if Alec were to throw in a movie machine of some kind, and maybe those old classics, all those books to movies, it would tempt the dog man. He could actually see the books he so adored played out on the screen. But Alec knew that it was more selfish than anything. He was just having a hell of a time sitting still. And granted, if Joshua did someday down the road, express interest in that sort of stuff, Alec would certainly hop on the bandwagon. But why score something that Joshua just wouldn't and wasn't likely to use.
More time than Alec realized had passed and soon there was another knock at Joshua's door. Figuring it to be Max, ready to leave, Alec didn't hesitate in answering for his friend, as he was closer to the door than Joshua. But it wasn't Max, it was an unfamiliar transhuman. But the guy obviously knew Joshua, when he gave Alec a suitably amicable glance and then poked his head inside and called Josh's name.
The dog man glanced up from the book that was perched in his lap, his glance questioning. "Time?"
"Yup," the other transhuman nodded, his shock of red hair over fox-like features, falling into his face with the movement. "Got everything ready to go." Before Alec could ask what was going on, Joshua was putting his book away and clambering to his feet.
"Ah sorry man," Alec grunted as Joshua angled sideways to move past him in the limited space. "Didn't know you had plans. I'll just get out of your hair."
"No," Josh denied quickly. "Alec come too."
"Come to what?" Alec demanded perversely.
"Alec see," the bigger man replied enigmatically. Intrigued, Alec only hesitated a moment before trailing after the pair of transhumans. Neither talked between themselves and no words seemed to be needed. Alec knew immediately that they were heading to command center but was unsure as to why. They heard the low rumble from several blocks away. At first hearing, Alec tensed as he walked, for it sounded like an immeasurably large crowd. But there were no punctuated shouts that might indicate the angry mob had found its way into Terminal City.
As the trio rounded the last corner, Alec could see between the gap the other two made, that it was indeed a large crowd, surprisingly made up of numerous X5's that lived down past Oak Street and almost triple that in transhumans. He wondered what the hell they were gathering for and all around one building, talking quietly amongst themselves. Alec scanned the crowd for a more familiar face, since Josh and his foxy friend didn't seem in the mood to explain. At last, he caught sight of Mole, though he almost didn't recognize him, without his shotgun and typical cigar in place of honor at the corner of his mouth. But he still didn't see anyone else, really the one person he had been searching for. She wasn't around. Alec cursed silently, hoping like hell that she hadn't used his earlier confusion over his own actions to disappear. But no, Max had promised him. She probably just wasn't aware that something was going down here. Otherwise, she would have been in the thick of it, just as curious as he.
The crowd before them seemed to part easily and the trio slipped in amongst them and all the way up to Mole. Obviously they were waiting on Joshua. Alec had no idea where he was supposed to wait and Joshua hadn't told him otherwise, so he just trailed along behind the taller man, trying to puzzle out many things at once. Once Mole caught sight of them, as he'd been periodically glancing inside the main door to the building to whatever was inside, peered over Joshua's shoulder, caught sight of Alec and nodded once. He then pushed the door open further and gestured them inside. Alec, with still no countermanding of his actions, decided to follow them in. Only one way to satisfy his curiosity. But what he found stopped him dead in his tracks.
There was a single table in the room, bathed in a low light, but still easy enough to make out. And there on the table, a slightly grimy white sheet covering it, was the body of his dead friend. He couldn't have been sure, but he thought a choked, strangled noise escaped from his throat. And then a large scaly hand was pressing on his shoulder. His eyes still glued to the bruised and battered form of Biggs, Alec turned his head slightly, questioningly.
"We cleaned him up as good as we could," he heard Mole inform him. "Now let's go put him to rest."
Alec, for the first time in an amazingly long while, was speechless. His mind seemed numb, even though questions were whirling around just below the surface of that facade. How had they gotten Biggs back? Who had seen to this dangerous mission? What were they going to do to Biggs? But Joshua, sensing his confusion, drew Alec forth. He pressed Alec to an area just by Biggs' right shoulder. He could see now, that his friend wasn't just lying on a table. Someone had constructed a platform of sorts, probably out of old crates. Once Joshua had him in place, he scurried around Biggs' head to a position at Biggs' other shoulder. Alec heard more people joining up with them, the understanding filtering in slowly and he finally understood what they wanted him to do.
He felt a hand on his shoulder again, but instead of acknowledging it, his jaw clenched and his body tensed. He could get through this. He could do it if he could just keep that numb feeling cocooning his body and mind. As if seeming to recognize that decision, or probably the tautness of his shoulders had warned whomever had touched him, the hand slid away.
"Everyone ready?" Joshua asked softly, glancing behind him. There were no words, but Josh must have had assent because he nodded and began to slowly pick up the protruding two by four that Biggs' body rested on. Alec followed suit, his hand accidentally brushing the body and was surprised to find that at room temperature, his friend, his comrade in arms, was warmer than Alec's fingers.
The group of Alec didn't know how many followed his and Joshua's lead. Josh walked slowly enough that Alec could keep up, especially not knowing where they were supposed to be going. But Joshua seemed to realize this and whispered across to Alec, "Coombe's Alley."
Alec nodded once to show he had heard and understood. The place was almost directly central of Terminal City. There was a building there with underground parking. And it was to that place he set his feet.
The journey took less time than Alec would have thought, especially carrying one hundred and sixty pounds of slack weight. But any transgenics or transhumans that tired of the task, were swiftly and silently replaced by willing compadres following their mournful path. But not Alec. He led them the entire way, never once relieving himself of the burden. And neither did the person behind him as Alec constantly recognized the feel of that hand at his shoulder when Alec caught sight of eyes in the street as they came upon transgenic after transgenic that had known Biggs. Had loved him and who silently joined their progression.
When they finally made it to Coombe's Alley, what they called it since there had been a funny hand lettered sign at the entrance of the parking lot, Alec could see that much thought and preparation went into this all. A funeral pyre had already been erected. The strong smell of gasoline pervaded the area and there were some transhumans waiting with torches to be lit. Alec almost missed a step as this all came home to rest in his mind, but again that hand was at the small of his back. Not pushing, guiding or dominant, almost reassuring. Alec straightened his shoulders and the procession continued until they had laid Biggs atop the carefully made stack of crates.
Everyone else seemed to step back, melding into the crowd that had followed them down into the shadowy area. Except Alec. He stayed there, by his friend, almost afraid to move away. To take this last unalterable step in the loss of Biggs. But then, he heard Mole.
"We don't have any fancy religion," the lizard man's voice was booming to be heard by all the crowd. "We don't have any words to send Biggs on. All we have is right here and now. Manticore owned his life until we were set free. Fear and the Ordinaries ruled that life for the last year. But now he's here with us. And they will never have him again!"
There were murmurs, even some roars of approval and Alec could feel the pulsing of his heart in his ears, his throat and he was nodding his approval. Mole was right. They would see to it. Those bastards would never touch Biggs again. And there was that hand at the small of his back. Someone understood and he took comfort in it.
"He was X5-511," Mole continued once the roars had died down. "A damn good soldier!"
"He was," Joshua growled out. "A good friend to others!"
"He was Biggs!" Alec yelled out, caught up in the moment of his friend's life. "One hell of a brother!"
Again the roaring noise took up behind him and someone pressed a torch into his hand. Alec, moving like someone in a dream, let Mole light the blackened end of the stick and stepped forward cautiously. With a whispered goodbye, he set the end to the bottom of the bier and watched in strange fascination as the flames transferred, took hold and began to lick their way up the mounds of wood.
Alec didn't know how long it took for the bonfire to consume his friends body. But he stood there until the last of it, as he could hear and feel many others doing as well. It was nearly dawn before Joshua stepped forward again and held his hands up. The crowd that was already quiet, silenced themselves even more, barely breathing as they waited to hear what the dog man was going to say.
"Everyone invited back to headquarters for Irish wake," the first among transhumans announced simply.
The crowd that decided to join in this mournful celebration of his friend's life, once again wound their way back to headquarters, moving a little more swiftly that their previous journey. But to Alec, it felt as if the burden was still on his shoulders, still weighing down his body. He wondered if his steps would ever be light again.
He'd barely made it in the door when a bottle of Scotch was pressed into his hand. Glancing around, he could see that everyone, even the younger X-series were getting something. Bottles, cans, glasses and in some cases, age being little factor, something lighter. Pop, water, some of the precious canned fruit juice they'd managed to hoard. Alec and the rest waited until everybody finally had something liquid in their hands. Knowing about and understanding the next step in the long road to healing, Alec used his teeth to pull the aged cork out of the bottle, spat it to the floor and lifted the bottle high above his head.
"To Biggs!" he shouted out.
The muted roar echoed in his ears, as one, the Terminal City population called back, "to Biggs!"
Ignoring the burning in his chest, trying to replace it with one more familiar, Alec set the bottle rim to his lips and chugged. It was the only thing that he could think of that might help bring on a completion of numbness. Something he needed right now. For an Irish wake was one of the things he was vaguely familiar with in this world.
To his relief though, no one waited for him to start. People were already talking about Biggs. Relating stories they knew of him and his exploits back at Manticore, or some funny situation or other that he'd gotten into since the destruction of their so-called "home". Alec even found himself smiling sadly on occasion as he drifted around the room, pausing now and then when he heard about things that Biggs had never told him about in life. And considering the embarrassment factor in these words, Alec didn't have to look for a reason why the other man, proud and willful, would keep them from his best friend. They were definitely master material for an all out pissing match between males looking to be on top of the testosterone heap. And Alec knew that if he'd ever had known, he wouldn't have hesitated in yanking Biggs chain. Not that he'd have the chance now.
It wasn't until he heard her name, that Alec realized vaguely what he'd been searching for in that room. It was easy enough to pick out who had been talking, since Mole continued on as if Alec hadn't stopped dead in his tracks.
"... and if the cops do come down on us, her highness wants us to be ready," Mole finished. The small group gathered around the rickety table all nodded their agreement.
"What the hell did Max do that has her fearing the cops retaliation?" Alec demanded, his ire from her earlier behavior rising once more. Mole eyed him, considering, before shoving a chair towards the X5. Alec swung it around, careful not to spill the precious liquor still left in the bottle. He took his seat and waved his free hand in a rolling motion to encourage Mole to continue.
"Thought you knew," Mole simply grunted. But out of the corner of his eye, Alec saw Joshua shaking his head.
"Max say not to tell Alec until we knew if successful," Joshua informed the table at large.
"Knew what?" Alec demanded, the peevishness he was feeling towards her, growing.
"Well I thought Pretty Boy here would be number one on her list of recruits," Mole shrugged.
Again Joshua shook his head and shot a look at Alec that was pure apology. "Max say Alec already feel bad enough."
"She did huh?" Alec growled softly. "Bad enough about what?" There was silence and Alec's voice rose slightly as he repeated his demand.
Mole, Joshua and the other two that Alec hadn't been introduced to yet, all eyed one another uncomfortably.
"And speaking of Max, where the hell is she?" Alec demanded, the anger he was displaying was partly, or maybe majorly just a cover for the deeper underlying emotion that he certainly didn't care to examine at this time, if ever. Hurt. Pain that she didn't care enough to be here.
"Max go home," Joshua informed him promptly and then stuttered a little at the sudden fury on the X5's face. Damn it! He should have known she wouldn't keep to her promise. What had she done, crossed her fingers behind her back while she lied to him? "No, go Joshua's home," the big dog-man, corrected himself as he read and understood correctly Alec's anger. "Needed to get some things. Max be back soon."
The words took a few minutes to invade Alec's mind and he turned them over, his body sagging with relief. To cover, he took another deep draught of Scotch. Carefully controlling his temper and his tone, he bit out, "so again I ask, what didn't I know about?"
Finally one of the other transhumans leaned forward. "We thought you knew," he began, ignoring Mole and Joshua's knowing looks that spoke of the anticipation of a nuclear missile about to go off. "About the plan to get Biggs back."
"There was a plan?" Alec demanded numbly, his mind racing through those implications. The other man nodded. Mole sighed and leaned forward, one hand still gripped lightly about his own tumbler.
"Max was determined not to let the government or White have Biggs," he explained in a low voice. The lack of venom in his voice told Alec and the others that the girl had finally done something that the lizard man could fully approve of and in doing so, it had garnered some respect in certain quarters. "So she set up the raid on the Coroner's office. Planned it, executed it and got our boy back where he belongs."
"And you just let her!" Alec exploded. Joshua winced at the expected detonation.
"We didn't just let her do a damned thing!" Mole countered just as loudly. "Hell, she had half the population ready to back her up on this one. In fact-!"
"She didn't go alone Alec," Joshua interrupted. "Took a team."
"And had other teams getting everything else ready," the other transhuman, who hadn't spoken as of yet, piped up. Someone else, from behind Alec's shoulder, spoke up as well, causing Alec to whirl around in his seat.
"Got pretty hairy there too," Thunder, an X-5 that had already been living down on Oak Street before the others arrived, announced. "We almost had to abort, when the cops showed up. But Max wouldn't let us. Had to fight our way out. Damn heart almost stopped when that bullet took her down."
Alec felt his heart stop. It was only the memory of having seen her recently that started it up again. To know that she was okay, that she was still there with them.
"But she was just faking the bastards out," Thunder continued, pride over Max's cunning, evident in his voice.
"Oh, they did wing her," Chill chuckled morosely. He was another X-5, one that worked in the makeshift infirmary they'd set up. "Caught her in the upper arm, just a graze. But it still stings like hell." Alec winced a little as the memory of hauling Max closer to himself, by the arms, shaking her, flashed in his mind. No wonder she'd looked...
"And that's why she's got some guard rotations set up around the perimeter," Mole concluded. "Little heavier than usual. Also heard that the Ordinary's gonna do a hack and clue in the public that it was all about having our own back with us, honor the dead and all that namby pamby crap the public will eat up."
Alec didn't know what to say. She'd set this up, done all this, and hadn't told him? Why? Joshua had said because she didn't want Alec to feel any more badly. Which he would have if they'd done the raid and it had failed. He had failed. Again. He was brought back to himself by someone gently pulling the bottle of Scotch from his numbed fingers. It was Joshua, looking him over carefully.
"Max give signal," he informed his medium fella softly. "Time to go. If Alec up to it."
"Up to what?" his voice slurred more from exhaustion than drink. An exhaustion that was due to the weariness of mind and soul rather than body.
"One last thing to honor Biggs," Joshua replied. Pushing his chair back, he stood and waited for his friend. Alec carefully reached for the bottle on the table and gave it a nudge towards the others before following suit.
He kept his mind blank on this new unknown journey. He simply followed after Joshua, leading the way, with an even smaller group of X-5's and transhumans following after them. Again, he was led to a place he was not overly familiar with, but he was glad to be greeted by several familiar faces, among them Cece, OC, some others he knew and then, as the crowd parted, he saw her, Max.
Her body was facing a low brick wall, though she had twisted her upper torso to watch them approach. In her hands were some incongruous items. An old paint scraper and a brick. He shook his head a little, trying to clear away the multitudes of cobwebs that confusion and too much information had brought on.
It was Cindy that approached him first. She gently took his arm and squeezed, looking up at him. He stared down into her face. "I'm sorry baby Boo," she whispered for him alone. She didn't have to elucidate. He knew that she hadn't been there for the funeral pyre and he hadn't seen her at the wake. But she was here now and it counted.
"What is this?" he asked just as quietly, gesturing to the wall, to the canvas bag resting on the ground, to the buckets lined in front of the solid line of bricks.
"Its a grieving wall," Cindy sighed. "Don't know where she got the idea, but Max..."
"It's okay," Alec sighed, interrupting. "You don't have to explain." And she didn't, because somewhere deep inside of himself, Alec already understood. A place to show the physical evidence of the grief that they couldn't hold onto themselves. They had to be brick walls themselves and couldn't afford the luxury of carrying grief around with them. Just like Manticore wanted. But they could have this.
"Alec come," Joshua instructed, gently leading Alec to where the canvas bag rested. Others had already gathered around. Joshua leaned over the bag and began withdrawing bricks, handing them around to various people. Finally there were just a few left and Joshua pushed open the bag fully to display them to a waiting Alec. "Alec choose one for Biggs."
Alec nodded, getting a semblance of the idea as he'd watched the others collecting theirs. This was what Joshua had been sculpting. "A poor man's tombstone, huh?"
"Somethin' like that," Cindy murmured.
Alec looked at the choices laid out before him, his hands tracing over each rough sketch, his mind cataloging what he could of them. Until finally, he found himself being drawn back again and again to a sword, broken across about midway. He lifted it, hefting the weight of it in his hand. As if the matter were decided, Joshua nodded his head and removed the bag from Alec, twisting it shut and letting it come to rest on the ground, out of the way.
"A broken sword?" Cindy asked, her own fingers tracing over the symbol.
"For a life cut short," Joshua explained, still within hearing distance. Everyone nodded their agreement.
Alec, still feeling the strange numbness he'd been yearning for, yet not what he'd expected, watched as the others began moving forward to place their own bricks on the wall. Reaching into the buckets for mortar in which to keep the bricks in place when dried. The efforts weren't perfect, after all, Manticore had never offered bricklaying courses. But in Alec's eyes, it was beautiful. And he just as quickly remembered another time and place, when he had participated in the honoring of the dead. Back just after he'd met her and Max had insisted upon honoring those who hadn't made it out, or had fallen under the then unknown White's maniacal boot of fanaticism in wiping out their kind. He could still feel the chill that had swept over him, standing at attention, as little Bugler had played Revellie on his bugle.
This was better.
This was their own way.
Slowly, he made his way forward, looking for a spot for Biggs. Of course, the only one open was right next to Max. Just a little fearful, not knowing for once what to say to the beautiful woman that had made this all possible, Alec stepped into the line, beside her. She didn't look at him, but kept her eyes firmly on the work in front of her. From the depth of her line, he could see that she had already placed many bricks and was now setting the last one. None of them had names on them, they weren't needed. Alec knew, that like his own, the image on those bricks would be seared into her mind. He looked at the last brick she lay as he reached for some clay mortar out of the bucket. A delicate looking olive branch had been carved into the side, positioned carefully and Max studiously cleared away the clay that had oozed out between layers. She wiped it off, back into the bucket, smoothed the clay some more and then with her free hand, wiped away a small smudge from the brick beneath, so that none would be marred.
Something about the olive branch seemed to tug at his mind and the words slipped from his mouth before he knew it. "For Ben?"
Still without looking at him, her fingers lingering, she whispered, "for his forgiveness."
There was nothing else he could say to that and with a new found determination, Alec took her place, adding his, Biggs' brick to the wall. Smoothing the lines just as carefully as she had done, careful not to infringe upon anyone else's place. Cleaning it with respect.
He stepped back from the completed section, sad with the knowledge that this would not be the last time they did this and not knowing how long this brick wall would stand as testament. But like the transgenics and transhumans and all those that supported them, they were here and it would take more than the world knew to get rid of them.
Alec again didn't know how much time had passed before he realized that the sun was setting once more. Most of those that had come with them had left by now. He was surrounded by a small group. Just he and Max with Cece, Cindy and Joshua at their backs.
Now that he had come here, to this wall and recognized the symbolism, he had been able to put a few things to rest. He would never forget. But he wouldn't let them weigh him down so much anymore. He couldn't afford to. But there were still some things left to be said.
When he turned to her, Max was right at his shoulder. When his arm came up to pull her closer, he could now feel the bandage on her upper arm, concealed by her coat. He held her gently, not wanting to cause any more damage than what had already been done. A little overwhelmed, his head turned, his forehead coming to rest on her shoulder. He had sworn that he wouldn't break down, not any more and especially not right now and he held true to that. Only one strong shudder passed through him as he exhaled the words, "thank you."
He didn't say for what, because there was just too much. Thanks for having brought his friend home. For understanding what this meant to all of them. For finding the perfect way to say goodbye. For not retaliating earlier and just accepting his anger, even misplaced as it was. The list could go on. And when her smaller hand came up to rest on the back of his shoulder, he recognized the familiarity of it at once, and added his thanks that she'd been at his back either physically or emotionally through this whole ordeal.
He didn't have to say it, because she knew what he meant. Her head rested against his and he could feel the burning heat of tears running into his hair. Tears that she cried rarely, but deeply. For herself, for him, for those left behind and those no longer here. He didn't know if anyone else heard her murmur, but the words would always stay with him.
"You're welcome, my friend."
No comments:
Post a Comment